For the Highest Good! Amen.
Recently, I’ve experienced a feeling of anger/shame/guilt – something like that – toward myself. This feeling arose because I’ve been mentally projecting that I did something stupid.
In the midst of coping with this feeling of suffering over me feeling like I did something stupid and acted hastily when patience would have been better, I found myself praying for help, asking, “Give me some perspective!”
I don’t know if I’ve ever had that prayer before: “Give me some perspective!” But it certainly helped and continues to help.
So here I am – projecting impatience and stupidity onto myself, thereby feeling bad. What’s the antidote to heal this?
There is probably more than one…
1. Forgive myself. Accept that when I made the decision that I am labeling as poor, I was doing the best that I could at the time. If I knew better, I would have done better. I need to express compassion toward everyone, including myself. We all operate with some degree of ignorance, and out of ignorance I made a ‘poor’ choice. A worse choice would be to not forgive myself, continue to condemn myself, and wallow in the negativity. A wise choice is to practice forgiveness, let the past be the past, learn the lessons and grow and become better from the suffering.
2. Learn from the mistake. What did I do that was wrong? I acted hastily, perhaps greedily, perhaps out of fear. So – I need to learn patience, I need to learn faith, I need to learn to trust and relax and to discern before making big decisions: weigh the pros and cons. What really matters? What are the benefits? Will this harm anyone? Will this help at least one person? What can I learn from this mistake? How could I upgrade my way of living to demonstrate that I learned from this mistake?
3. Perspective! In this particular example that I’ve been living out, I made what I might consider a financial mistake. For perspective, I could zoom out and imagine the financial condition of people around the world, and I can see that even despite the mistake I made, I am still fortunate. And, even though this ‘suffering’ arose under the umbrella of ‘finances,’ to resolve the suffering I can zoom out beyond that, acknowledging that finances are just one small aspect of the human experience, and I can look at all the other areas of life and how they are doing and how much there is to be grateful for. Zooming out in another way, I can see that apparent mistake I made might not actually turn out to be a mistake at all, and it could even work out in my favor – how could I really know for certain one way or the other? Zooming out and considering the goal and purpose of life, amassing money is not the goal or the purpose, and there is no guarantee even that more money would move me closer toward the goal or purpose of life – which for now let’s just say is Happiness. There are plenty of people with oodles of money who do not experience as much happiness as some people who don’t have nearly as much. In fact, the most supremely loving, peaceful, blissful, and happy people have all basically had no money to their name: think of Buddha, Jesus, Mother Theresa, Mahatma Gandhi. No money, no problems – just Love and Peace!
4. A great opportunity! Adversities are blessings in disguise! Loss is an opportunity for greater freedom!
To disclose some of the details of the financial mistake, I essentially traded some bitcoin a few days ago right before the market has skyrocketed upward – so in a way it looks like I missed out on a few thousand dollars profit – which to me is a significant amount. Alas, there were plenty of perks with what the trade too, and it is important to remember those. I essentially gave over managing my finances to professionals / family, which costs a bit but it relieves me of the great burden of thinking about investments every day and instead I have the freedom to sit back, relax, and trust completely. Even if it all goes to zero, I don’t think I would really mind – especially because I would just take that as a sign to live a simple life, but I am already doing that – so it wouldn’t really affect me much at all.
So anyway, I’ve been beating myself up (mentally) about a potential of a few thousand dollars missed profit. Yet, since the money is being re-invested, in the long-run it could really turn out much to my favor in a financial way and beyond. I really cannot know for certain, so there is definitely no point of stressing about anything or feeling guilty — the ignorance of the future is inescapable! Yet, we all can know the Presence of God now and eternally, so I guess we can know that about the seeming future 😉
To summarize, I think the big lessons for me are to:
– slow down. think. patience. patience attains the goal! With big decisions, it is okay to take time to reflect, write things down, get clear, talk it over. There is no rush. Hurrying is a total illusion of the ego. Haste makes waste. Don’t get caught in the nonsense. Sit back and relax. Enjoy the show!
– accept that I don’t know. I really cannot know on pretty much any level if the decision was good or bad – I’m just saying it was bad because in a few days bitcoin went up and I ‘missed out,’ but who knows how it would have played out otherwise and what how everything will continue to unfold? It is nice to not know. And, not knowing is more aligned with the truth. Reality is Reality! What is, what is, is. No use getting caught up in all sorts of hypotheticals, “Well what if I held it a few more days and then sold it? Then I’d have so much more…” These hypotheticals are just that, hypothetical with no real reality. Sooo….stop being delusional and just stay humble, don’t know, and trust in God.
– let the past go. Past is past. don’t dwell on it. let it go. learn from it, and live in the Golden Present!
– Have faith! Trust in God! Don’t concern over these petty things. Wear the world like a light garment. Retire from the dramas of the world.
– Act with a good intention, for the highest Good, and with a pure heart and intention – let it go and trust the process. Have no fear! Motivated by love, there is nothing to fear.
– Happiness dependent on anything is utter misery! Don’t get caught in the delusions of the world. The Source of Happiness and Joy is Within and not dependent on external things. Everything you want is within.
– Stay connected with a Higher Purpose. Would a few thousand dollars really change your life that much? Would it really impact how you are living on a daily basis and how you are pursuing great, worthy, noble goals? Keep your eyes on the prize! The prize is not 0s in the bank account, but rather Eternal Peace and Happiness. Sometimes, when a few 0s in the bank account are lost, that leads to our Happiness increasing, because we learn a lesson – that 0s do not dictate our happiness! And that is real freedom!
– Be free! Not bound by worldly stuff. Love is always present. Love is more valuable than anything else. And Love is Free! Free to Love and Enjoy every moment 🙂
Gloria in Excelsis Deo!